9. The weather, so terrible. Plus: food!

Oh, Missoula, you may be nice today but don't think I've forgotten about the terribleness of Sunday and Monday. Nor have I forgotten that June 11, 2008, looked like this:



Summer was such a tease, it lasted two days. And so leaf subsides to leaf, and although only a few trees in my realm have started changing colors, I'm doomsdaying. My house is 5 degrees warmer than outside and it's only going to get colder. What a terrible, terrible cold place. I go to bed at night and shiver for an hour feeling feverish, entertaining wild thoughts of moving back to California to follow the sun, or to Seattle, where winter doesn't happen and rain is a myth.

I remember once upon a time when I stood outside in the dimming evening without a jacket last week, watching the folks of the town converged upon the Oval, singing. The singing was horrible but at least it was warm out. There was a bonfire because everyone loves fire. Some of the students from the village had climbed up the face of the mountain to the giant white concrete M, and when it turned dark they turned on their flashlights and waved them around. There were not enough students to outline the whole M but the people in the valley below cheered anyway. Suddenly, without warning, fireworks were lit off right above my head. Debris rained down. I am now terrified of three things, fireworks being one of them.

Today in Missoula it was nice. So was yesterday. Tomorrow will be as well. Whatever though, you know? Winter breathes down our necks.

Some days I'd just rather walk than ride my bike even if it triples the commute time. This afternoon the air was a little warm and heavy and walking seemed like the best thing to do. Near the footbridge the band was practicing and anyone who knows anything at all about me knows that one of the few pleasures I have on this planet is marching bands. Now I'm at home grilling, or trying to. I've already mangled the pineapple and killed the charcoal - if this doesn't work I'll cook everything in the oven and it won't be very awesome but I'll try again tomorrow.

IMPORTANT UPDATE: The grilling was a raging success and I'm never eating anything ever again unless it's been grilled THAT's how good it was and I should have a party on Saturday night, a grilling party, and everyone can come over to my cold tiny house and I will grill for them like the grilling pro I have become. Tomorrow night when I get home from yoga - never mind, I'm going to Libby, Montana after yoga - but maybe after that I'll come home and stay up all night grilling. I want to bring my little grill into my house because it is cold inside and the grill is hot.

The grill was a gift from my kind former neighbors Matt and Kate.

8. Weather, radio

Hi, Missoula, you're so beautiful. You've been pretty stinking nice all week, and all last weekend, too. I've been sleeping with my windows open at night again.

The moon earlier this week gave me a strong hankering for Neil Young and "Harvest Moon" and songs about the moon in general, and on my radio show this week I played some moon songs. I couldn't have done a show of only moon songs because of playlist/rotation stuff that I had to play, and even if I had played only moon songs it would have been untimely and awkward, being in the middle of the day. But maybe one day I'll cover a graveyard shift during the full moon and play a few hours of moon songs.

I can't stop listening to Langhorne Slim. They came through Missoula last week and I had no idea. I just happened to be out and about and all I caught was their soundcheck (I have an early bedtime) but I was so impressed I introduced myself and Mr. Slim himself gave me a copy of their new CD for the radio station. I enjoy.

Bill Cosby looks like my dad. Or vice versa, probably.

7. Running, weather, various calamities

Shit:

1. My favorite pen at work ran out of ink. The bookstore does not carry replacement ink cartridges.


2. Recently I have lost all of the following:


1. two pairs of sunglasses


2. a vintage 5 Valleys 5K series commemorative sweatshirt from the inaugural year of the series (2007) (and if you've read my essay about last year's running season [pg. 5] you understand how heartbroken I am about this)


3. one (1) pink Planetary Design Double Shot french press coffee mug (stolen!) (PINK)


4. my car keys, rendering my car unusable except as a planter or other decorative item (a largish problem)


5. $5


3. They raised the coffee prices at the market and I was ten cents short this morning.


4. I got hit by a car today on my way to work.

Not shit:

1. They gave me my coffee anyway.


2. Yesterday I had ice cream.


3. Insomniatrical moments are coming at 6 a.m. these days instead of 4 a.m.


4. Not dead yet.

I did not do the 15K yesterday because that's when I discovered I'd lost my car keys and there I was, stranded in the lower Rattlesnake while the race was taking place far away at Blue Mountain. I often casually lose my car keys, finding them after an easy lighthearted search, but this time they're not anywhere a smart person would put them. I've checked pockets. I've checked the refrigerator and the freezer. I looked in the car and under the car. I looked in my mailbox. Gone. And seriously, crap! because my car has been costing me an arm and a leg lately (new power steering rack + insurance + registration + loan payments + gas = tons of dollars) and now I can't even use it and I don't even drive the bastard (raddest car in Montana!) anyway except to go to Sandpoint. I love my car and if I sold it I'd be selling a piece of my soul (histrionics) but my checkbook would be better off and Microsoft Money would stop shouting at me every time I do my finances (once or twice in a blue moon).

This weekend I: went to First Friday and briefly saw my dear old friends Jordon and Xtino, ran a 10K and got a certificate stating that I'm probably just about the fastest person ever, took a nap and a half, drank two (2) Dr. Peppers, finished one book and nearly finished another (which I've been reading for the last 6 months), ate about four (4) lunches in two days, went to bed early, had a dream that I was a little boy whose dad had died (it was sad and woke me up), ran alone on the Kim Williams trail instead of doing an awesome race at Blue Mountain, cleaned out my stupid bathroom, painted so much my forearms are sore, drilled and hammered, scoured out my sink, washed about 9,000 dishes, took a shower (or two).

Forecast for today: sunny and 77. It's still pretty shocking that summer is over and I'm still incredibly angry and/or pissed about it, but yesterday was a really nice day and today is looking to be that way again. Fall is nice - I like fall a lot, I just hate the end of summer.

I suppose I could start wearing my helmet when I ride my bike.

6.

Today at work during the course of doing something incredibly important and pressing I came upon a picture of Hong Kong at night and now it is my desktop background and now I want to go to Hong Kong. I became hopelessly distracted by the picture and half an hour later tried to refocus on work - the thing I was doing was incredibly important and pressing and still is incredibly important and pressing and I need to do it, either now or later, but now would be better.

This will be my third four-day week in a row at work - I've missed the last two Fridays because I went home two weekends in a row, and this week is short because of the holiday. I am behind on my work. I am also behind at home. No one's paid my bills, no one's cleaned my house, no one's balanced my checkbook, no one's pulled weeds, no one's done anything at all. My house has been driving me crazy. For weeks I've been wanting to pick up every single thing I own and put it out in my yard, then sweep, then put everything back in a different place. Am I really going to live in that tin can another winter?

So I've been busy and have "lost" the last two weekends. Here's what I did instead of housework: saw one of the most incredible concerts ever, drove through torrential downpours, saw a perfect rainbow, ate at Dick's in the middle of the night, ran across the Long Bridge, went to the Bonner County Fair, took Fair Queen photos, washed my car, read, went swimming, took a nap, watched a movie, ate a lot of food, dried some hops, went to the Farmer's Market, went to an antique show, went shopping, went to coffee hour after church (but didn't go to church), played the piano, caught up with my oldest friends, saw my exbestfriend get married (a happier person I've never seen in all my days), made friends pose for couples portraits for my new soft-porn wall calendar business, hiked through ancient forests, drank coffee and ate bread. I can't complain about anything at all.

A couple years ago I came to the conclusion that things will never slow down - this is my life - but I'd forgotten that so I've had to come to that conclusion again. This weekend I have two races, a 10K and a 15K, and I thought after that things would slow down but they won't. The real conclusion is this: I don't want things to slow down - if I did, I'd stop doing what I do. Everything I do I do because I want to.

p.s. The picture of Hong Kong is so incredible - I'm such a sucker for light and water.