69.

Dear Sandra,

I heard the song your boyfriend wrote for you and even though you and I don't know each other I feel compelled to reach out. I'm worried about you. Your boyfriend's admonitions are signs of a controlling and paranoid personality. If a man answers your phone when he calls, he will break up with you - no room for explanation, no give or take. He offers no reasonable evidence that you're cheating on him, and he refuses to consider the possibility that the man answering your phone might be your father, or a telephone repairman.

You don't need that kind of emotional manipulation in your life - the paranoia, suspicion, jealousy, controlling behavior, the threats. Yes the song is catchy - I'm sure you've stayed up late dancing to it - but don't let the rock and roll blind you to what it actually is. The whole song is a threat! He even has to bring up all the money he's spending to call you. Let me be frank, Sandra: you need to break up with Bobby. He's a bully.

Look, I don't know you at all, and for all I know you're not two-timing Bobby - you probably aren't, he's obviously a paranoid jerk - but if you are, you need to break up with the other guy as well. I can understand why you'd seek shelter from Bobby Darin the control freak, but to go directly to a guy who thinks he needs to be the one to answer someone else's phone when it rings - why? He sounds just as controlling as Bobby!

Honey, dump them both, and spend some time alone. Start a journal. Go on a trip. Maybe look into counseling. You don't need a man bossing you around, calling you all the time, answering your phone. Take some time for yourself and become the strong, independent woman that I know you can be. Take care of yourself!

Kelsi

p.s. Just so you know, Bobby's selling records of this song all over the place, even Bonners Ferry, so complete strangers are privy to these problems in your personal life.